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The Day

We were in and out of clinics and hospitals since October last year because of your stroke and dementia.

Last May 25, after your 74th birthday, Kuya called and asked how old you were. You answered, "Malapit na." 😥

We knew it. We knew that day was coming, but we kept pushing the thought aside.

You had your ECG last Saturday, and you were supposed to have your follow-up checkup and other laboratory tests at NCMH on Friday, June 5. But these past few days, you've been a little more unresponsive and haven't been eating well. Deep down, I had a feeling this day would come and that you wouldn't make it to Friday. Still, we pushed through with your scheduled ECG last Saturday.

For the past few weeks, you've been calling the names of your siblings, those who have already passed away and those who are still alive. You kept wondering where they were and why they hadn't come to see you since you got sick.

We never had a perfect father-daughter relationship. You were stubborn and hard to please. We had a lot of misunderstandings, and we argued more times than I'd like to admit. But I hope you knew that I showed you love and care in the best way I knew how.

I'm sorry I wasn't able to give you the life you dreamed of, but I did my best to give you a comfortable life.

I hope you also knew how grateful I am for everything you've done for us. We saw all your sacrifices, and there is no doubt that you were a good provider. You did everything you could for our family. And when you got sick, I hope you knew that we also did everything we could and gave our very best to take care of you.

Right now, it feels like I'm just floating through each day since yesterday. All I know is that I need to keep going and take care of everything for your funeral and interment.

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